grading poorly written research essays and preparing a presentation on "Teddy
Roosevelt and masculinity in crisis" (the high point is showing a film clip from
a made-for-TNT movie by none other than John "Red Dawn" Milius). My day was made
earlier when the Maximum Guttenburg blog got its 4th official reader! In
celebration, I present this:
(That comes via Ege, the 3rd official reader)
Notice that, even on the Rock Tour (episode V1/2), R2D2 is stuck as a roadie.
I've got a completely badass post on Commando coming up, but until then, here's a selection from Wendy Molyneux's new McSweeney's post, "Failed Role-Playing":
Naughty Schoolgirl and Randy Literature Teacher
Required costumes:
1. Catholic-school uniform and patent-leather shoes 2. Conservative sweater and corduroys
TEACHER: Young lady, I'd like to talk to you in my office.
SCHOOLGIRL: OK. I'd love to come in your office.
TEACHER: Fine. I'm concerned about the paper you wrote on Emily Dickinson. You just wrote "She was crizzazy" on a piece of notebook paper. Emily Dickinson was a proto-modernist and a groundbreaking female poet. She was certainly eccentric, but calling her crazy denies the possibility that her unique aesthetic was intentional and implies that her poems were simply the product of mental illness.
SCHOOLGIRL: That's not very sexy.
TEACHER: Are you taking too many classes? Is that why you aren't finishing your work?
SCHOOLGIRL: Maybe if I take off my top and my—
TEACHER: Please stop that. I don't want to lose my job. Now, if you agree to do a makeup assignment on floral imagery in the poetry of Marianne Moore, I'll overlook this.
SCHOOLGIRL: But—
TEACHER: My office hours are over now. I'll look forward to getting that paper next week.
SCHOOLGIRL: I think we should get couples counseling.
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